Listen, I love America. I love almost everything about it – freedom, nuclear weapons, mega churches, prison rape, hoarders, Velveeta Cheese, NASCAR Supertruck Series, professional wrestling, and Mexicans – I could go on all day, it’s all really great! My favourite thing about America though, is Black Friday. Admittedly, I don’t know much about Black Friday. I know that a bunch of stores have some good prices on merchandise. And who doesn’t love a good sale?! I certainly do! Anyways, I also know that a lot of really crazy people go to these sales. I’m not really sure if these people are normally crazy or the sales somehow make them do crazy things. It doesn’t matter though, this isn’t a Sociology lesson… What does matter though is that we use these videos of the best/worst moments of Black Friday to learn from the dangers of greed, violence, and mob rule permeating our culture…or at least to laugh at the overweight yankees as they toil and struggle to wrap their chubby fingers around the last half price xbox 360…and thanks to the internet, literally watch in real time as these fat slobs drag us all down with their ever-worsening culture and economy at exponentially increasing speeds . So pull up a chair, pour yourself a martini, make sure the door is safely dead bolted in case this tinderbox known as the world economy finally goes up in flames…and make the best out of what are undoubtedly our final few months of electricity/no cannibalism.
Without further ado: I present you with my top video picks of Black Friday 2011. Enjoy
1. We really love cheap towels
2. Guy maybe steals a couple video games, Police definitely put a stop to it
3. Trash-stash trolls Best Buy Black Friday line
4. 4GB of madness!
5. Even Mick Foley loves Black Friday!